Sunday, October 10, 2010

Giving Thanks


One of my favorite t-shirts has faces of little Pilgrim and Indian children singing the praise chorus with these words:

"Give Thanks with a grateful heart,
Give thanks to the Holy One,
Give thanks for He has given Jesus Christ, His Son--
And now, let the weak say I am strong,
Let the poor say I am rich,
Because of what the Lord has done for me,
Give Thanks."

This month I want to share some ideas to give thanks--and celebrate Thanksgiving. But first---some matters of "housekeeping".

We're making some changes in our newsletter, and one change is that I'm combining "Home Matters "and "Caring for Kids" into one column. After lenghty deliberation (and lack of better ideas), I'm calling it "Heart and Home Matters". I ruled out some other names--"Home Matters", it turns out is actually part of the website of Cynthia Heald, a wonderful Christian author who writes about home organization--I mentioned her book and website (http://www.hearthandhome.com/) in an earlier blog. "Home Base" sounded like a baseball blog, which I'm certainly not qualified to write. "Home on the Range" seemed appropriate, since I live in a small town in Kansas, but the title I really would love to use is "Random House". Goodness knows, I am certainly qualified to write about this(more on that later)--but alas, the big publishing company might take offense at me using their name. So,unless anyone out there has a better idea, we're going with Heart and Home Matters.

As always, my goal is to give you (and me!) ideas to express God's love in our homes and to our families and friends in practical ways.

So, then...let us be thankful before we "talk turkey" (I couldn't resist) let's focus on our "attitude of gratitude". Being thankful is a choice--we can see what we don't have and complain to God(as the Israelites wandering in the desert)or we can determine we will look for God's blessings and goodness in all our circumstances. (Which,by the way,we are commanded to do-"Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is the will of Christ for you."

Being thanks filled--remember the "Glad game"-Pollyanna style?


Remember the Pollyanna movie? (Watch it this month with popcorn and a hankie--tell the kids not to be scared when she falls from the window--that worried me a lot when I was little). Pollyanna's father, a minister, taught her to be glad or thankful in spite of their circumstances--we can play the "glad" or "thankful" game this month--Read on.

We all have so very much to be thankful for--our homes, families and friends, freedoms, country, talents, physical bodies, beauty all around us from God's creation, and most of all thanks for our Savior Jesus who offered us freedom from death in our sins, forgiveness and an abundant life!

This month, offer up a sacrifice of praise and "thanks offerings"--be glad for what God has done!

"He who sacrifices thank offerings honors me, and he prepares the way so that I may show him the salvation of God."_Psalm 50:23

"It is good to give thanks to the Lord."-Psalm 92:1

"Blessed be the Lord, who daily loads us with benefits, the God of our salvation."-Psalm 68:19

"He who offers a sacrifice of thanksgiving honors Me."-Psalm 50:23

*Write these verses, plus other "thanksgiving verses" on index cars and post them around your house for your family and guests to also read.

*Each morning, think of 5 things to thank God for and you could even write them in a"Thanksgiving Journal".

*Encourage your family to share 5 (or 3) things about their day for which they're thankful at supper.

*Talk with your family about contentment--are we content with what God has given us? When we want more, or wish things were different, we're saying we don't like what God has done for us, that it isn't enough, or that we know better what is good for us than God does! Yikes!( Our country has a big problem with contentment--so many people go into debt to have more than they can really afford. Think of all the advertising devoted to making us want more and more! Contentment is a good isssue to discuss, especially with the commercialism of Christmas lurking around the corner ).

*Print off the words, or enlarge copies of the hymns, "Count Your Blessings", "Come Ye Thankful People, Come" and "We Gather Together" to read/sing with your family.

*Visit your Christian Bookstore or library to revisit the story of the Pilgrims and the first Thanksgiving. Two wonderful books are Give Thanks by Karla Dornacher(full of beautiful illustrations and a month's worth of giving thanks devotions) and Thanksgiving, A Time To Remember by Barbara Rainey(a Family Life book--you could order it from their website, http://www.familylife.com/) This is the best blending of the historical story of the Pilgrims, Biblical teachings, and family activities I've seen.

(Remember my commenting that I should write a "random house" blog? Here's the story--I have been procrastinating writing this blog--yesterday I decided to clean out the frdge instead of writing, and this morning I decided to rearrange the living room furniture. In doing so, I remembered that I store the seasonal books in one of the end tables--I found these two books just in time to share with you--hurray!)

Now that our hearts are into giving thanks , we can focus on some other ideas for this holiday and hospitality.

1. Lower your expectations--the Norman Rockwell painting of the scrubbed and happy family gathered around the table with the beautifully browned turkey may not happen for you and yours. Our family has had some wonderful Thanksgivings, but we've also had our share of 7-up and chicken soup "feasts" due to the flu bug. My youngest was 5 years old before we celebrated with extended family again! Bad weather, schedule conflicts, family squabbles, tired and cranky adults and kids can all lead to a less than "perfect" holiday--remember to be thankful no matter what! (And remember to make good memories instead of making your ideal holiday)

2. Work ahead--if you're expecting company or hostessing the big Thanksgiving dinner, be a "Martha" now so you can be a "Mary" later and enjoy the time with others. I have learned to cook the turkey several days ahead of time, put the dark and white meat in freezer bags, save the juice in another freezer container and freeze it to be warmed up on Thanksgiving day. You can also make pies ahead of time, freeze rolls, and do your shopping days earlier also.

3. Prepare your home for hospitality--clean the fridge so you have room for all the food, clean the bathrooms and pick up clutter. Decide what plates--or paper plates you'll use, where everyone will sit, who will bring what food.

4. Enlist help from your family and guests--I love having people over, but get flustered when everyone arrives and needs something done in addition to what I'm trying to finish! Make a list of what needs doing, then cut apart and put each item in a "job jar". I put my wonderful nieces and nephews in charge of icing glasses, moving tables and chairs, serving beverages, clearing plates and serving desserts. It helps to put them in teams to complete different jobs.

5. Plan some meaningful and fun activities. You can have an "I'm thankful for.." index card at each place with 5 kernels of corn to remind everyone of the "starving time" the Pilgrims went through their first winter--be sure to sing a Thanksgiving song and pray at the meal.

Play flag football, (our family activity for over 20 years) take a walk and collect leaves, put together a new jigsaw puzzle, play games, watch a good movie or football game.

For our evening meal last year after the Thanksgiving turkey feast, I broke with tradition and we roasted hot dogs and made s'mores over our firepit in the backyard.(instead of leftovers) It was a big hit--and very simple!! Afterward,we sat bundled in blankets around the fire, sang, heard amazing poetry from my nephew Ryan, and talked under the stars--what a good memory.

6. Set up a self-serve coffee/hot cocoa/hot cider "bar" with mugs and some simple snacks.

7. Make Pilgrim hats for the younger boys out of ll x 13" black construction paper by cutting a u-shaped flap to stand up as the hat top, and rounding off the corners to be the bottom of the hat. For girls, use white construction paper and fold up long edge and shape rest to head, using another piece of paper to cut in a collar shape. Indian head bands and feathers are also fun to make from construction paper. A large box can be the Mayflower ship for the kids to play in, and an Indian tepee is made with a sheet over bamboo poles or tree limbs.

8. Another Thanksgiving afternoon or other time activity can be making caramel apples. Dip apples quickly in boiling water to remove wax coating, remove stems and refrigerate to cool. Put sticks in apples, melt a 1 pound bag of caramels with 2Tbsp. of milk in microwaveor on stove,dip apples, and roll in chopped nuts or mini-chocolate chips. Place on buttered wax paper to cool. Tell kids that the Bible tells us that "you are the apple of God's eye." (This idea from Karla Dornacher's book listed above.)

9. Ask your family what traditions are important to them for the holiday (s) and what is not. You may be surprised to find a labor-intensive food or activity doesn't really matter to anyone. Serve roast beef--or pizza-if that's what your family prefers. It may be time for new traditions --or not. I read a great story about a family that always gathers to make their great-grandmother's cookie recipe after Thanksgiving. The guys all go hunting, and the women, young and old, gather ingredients and dole out tasks to make a huge batch of the cookies. They call other family members on the phone who can't make it to cookie bake fest. The funny thing is, some of the women admitted that they don't even like the cookies that well--they're heavy, dense cookies--but they love getting together to make them!

So..however you choose to celebrate Thanksgiving, give thanks--lots of thanks--with a grateful heart. Be sure to tell those nearest to you how thankful you are for them!














Friday, October 1, 2010

Set Your Course for Adventure!

My husband just returned home from a week backpacking in the Ansel Adams Wilderness near Yosemite National Park. A highlight was rappelling down a 200 foot cliff-gasp! The group he was with calls themselves "Men in Midlife". (they leave off "crisis", as in "midlife crisis") Every two years,these guys from a church in Wisconsin and some others challenge themselves with an adventure along with a time of devotions and Bible study. My role in this deal was to be sure Don had the right supplies and to be his training buddy sometimes--only I wouldn't carry the 50lb. pack! He came back with a bit of a sunburn, scraped fingers and legs from rock climbing,some soreness,some great memories--and sleep deprivation. He is very glad he went--but he wasn't sure that if he'd known what he would be doing he would have signed up for this experience.

Isn't that the way for all of us? If we knew what all was in store for us in this adventure of life, we might not sign up!! Our theme is Changing Seasons of Life--especially a woman's life. Ouch. As a fairly new,and often reluctant,empty-nester this is not a topic I really want to talk about. But I do talk about it--to my other friends who are also struggling with the empty nest thing. Mostly, we feel like "has-beens". What do we do now? Does anyone still need us? (Actually,yes--our husbands and even kids still do)

I remember as a young mom with 3 kiddos ages 6 and under shopping at our local grocery store. I was trying to keep 2 kids in the shopping cart, in the exact middle of the aisle,out of arm reach of the items on each side. A sweet older lady came up to me, patted me on the arm,and said,"Honey,these are the best days of your life." I remember thinking--"great,I never sleep the whole night,the kids just got over the flu, and these are the best days?" Actually,I had the strong feeling that she was right. There are days I still think that!

To all you young moms--I know the days can be really, really long sometimes--but the thing is, the years are so short!! Try to freeze some of those precious moments in your mind--when your kids are so adorable and cute, you're just too busy to really focus on and enjoy them sometimes.

When my three were so small,our joke here was that I could do whatever I wanted as long as I took all 3 kids with me and had supper on the table at 6:oop.m. (Not really--my husband didn't mind much if supper was late)There was a time when I lamented that I would never get out of the house by myself again. Now I lament that there's no one here!!

So,what's a woman to do? Finding our way through the ages and stages of life is not for the timid. To be honest, I'm not quite resolved to my stage of life. I find myself crying at the oddest times--driving by our county fairgrounds, remembering all the fairs when my kids were in 4-H.(Sometimes I cried trying to get ready for the fair, but that's beside the point) Mom's walking their kids home from school also triggers regret that is isn't me walking my kids.

Here's what I keep reminding myself: God still has plans for me in this season of my life. He gives me a future and a hope. He will bring those things that will give meaning and purpose to my life.

Because of my husband's experience,I've been using that kind of self-talk. It's time to pack up my tent from the valley of "oh,poor me" and head for higher ground--to set my course for adventure! (Did you see the movie, UP?I love that line )

I am not planning a back country trip to rapell down a cliff--but,I have been working on pushing myself into some smaller adventures,and saying yes to God is the biggest adventure of all!
As my sons and their friends say,"If you're not living on the edge, you're just taking up space."

Whatever your age or stage, you need some adventure,too. Sometimes our fears keep us from venturing out of our comfort zone,and sometimes our self-images do. We think,"Oh,I could never do that..." When in fact actually we can--Philippians 4;13 tells us we can do anything through Jesus Christ who strengthens us.

One of my favorite magazines is a Christian one called, life:beautiful (Faith for your journey--www.lifebeautifulmagazine.com) In a recent article by Wanda Ventling and Allan Edeker, they say:

"Jesus uses adventure to confront who we are and make us who we are to be...God's adventures are personal, purposeful and productive."

They go on to give us some examples of adventures we can "rightsize" for ourselves--
volunteer in an inner city,chaperone a youth group trip,volunteer at a soup kitchen, sponsor a child, be a big sister,try out for a community band or play,take a day long hike or bike ride, share your faith with a friend or co-worker, go canoeing or whitewater rafting,go on a mission trip to a different city or abroad, start your own business,climb a mountain,run for an office,help build a home or clinic,confront abuse, injustice or gossip in your community, mend broken relationships, travel overseas, enter a contest,take a class,and the biggie--tell God, "Here I am, send me"--and mean it!

A popular book uses the term, "life bucket list". You're supposed to list some things you'd like to do/see in your life. Start a list--but remember to ask God what dreams He has for you,too! Anything that pushes you out of your comfort zone to rely on God is an adventure. And as my husband found out, we might not sign up if we knew what we'd be doing--but afterwards,we'll be glad we did!

"For God did not give us a spirit of timidity,but a spirit of power,of love and of self-discipline. -II Timothy 1;7

Home Base
In between adventures, we all need to return to home base to recharge and regroup. Fall is the season to "cozy up" your home--bring in the smells,colors,and tastes of autumn. Heat some spiced cider,bake some pumpkin cookies or pumpkin bread,decorate with leaves,nuts and pumpkins,add some candles and afghans for a cozy feeling.

Be equipped for adventure--now is the time to trade out summer clothes from your closets and drawers,and move the fall ones up. Be sure everyone has jackets accessible. Give away clothes you no longer wear or need. I'm a substitute teacher (talk about adventure!) and I organize my closet for quick choices--I have a few basic pairs of pants and several tops I hang together by color. I put the jewelry that would work with each outfit in a ziplock bag on the hanger. This does save time getting out the door.

Mundane but important--to keep your home base really cozy, have your furnace checked and change your furnace filters.

Fall Cleaning--if you do some now,you'll be in better shape for the holidays.(in both ways--cleaning is good exercise and your house will look better,too) Start at the top and work down--Wash windows, use a broom with a tea towel over it to dust ceilings,clean walls of smudges, clean/polish furniture,and vacuum/mop floors.

Not only will you be in better shape,but a recent study has found that visual clutter can cause migraines in some people. Another good reason to clear out!Besides, we're busy having adventures--who has time to dust extra,unneeded stuff?

On the book shelf: One of my favorite ways to have an adventure is in a good book.I'm recommending three I've read recently that will provide you with all the adventure you can handle!

The Forgotten God by Francis Chan, teaches us about the power of the Holy Spirit. Having radical faith can make your life an adventure,and several examples are given.
Dangerous Surrender, by Kay Warren, shows us what happens when you say yes to God. Kay's heart was broken by the AIDS epidemic in Africa and she began an on-going adventure to help alleviate the suffering of the children.
In a Heartbeat, by Sean and Leigh Ann Toughey, tells of their adventure in radical giving. This is the couple who adopted Michael Oher. The movie Blindside was based on their story, They practiced giving to kids long before this event,however,and it changed lives.

Whatever your age or stage,set your course for some adventure with God!!
Cozy up your home and enjoy Fall!